The Key to Managing, Moving Through & Owning Anxiety + The Link Between Childhood Trauma & Anxiety

In this podcast (episode #303) and blog, I speak with Caroline Foran, bestselling author, speaker, journalist, blogger, and top podcast host about making anxiety work for you and not against you, why anxiety is a signal and not a disease, how to manage anxiety using your incredible mind, and so much more!

Often, when you are going through a rough patch with anxiety, all the information and expert advice out there can be overwhelming. Sometimes all you want is to hear from someone who had a similar experience to you and that they still managed to get through it; you want to hear that there is hope. This is why Caroline does what she does; she wants to share her own experiences, what she has learned, and how she manages her own anxiety. She wants people to know there is always hope!

We need to remind ourselves that anxiety is normal, not abnormal. It is part of what it means to be human and experience life. Indeed, we should normalize not just talking about anxiety but experiencing it in the moment. If someone is having a bad day and they say that they are struggling with anxiety, that is okay! No one should feel guilty for having normal, human emotions and experiences.  

At the end of the day, the most important thing to remember is that if we feel something like anxiety, we need to let it happen AND we need to be kind to ourselves afterward! As Caroline notes in her amazing book Owning it: Your Bullsh*t-Free Guide to Living with Anxiety, the key to managing anxiety is not getting rid of it or fixing it but managing it, which means it no longer controls us. When we own our anxiety, our life can transform in ways we never thought possible! 

Part of coming to terms with our anxiety involves being vulnerable with both ourselves and those we trust. However, although vulnerability is the one thing we all have in common, it often is the one thing many of us try to hide behind. Yetvulnerability and sensitivity are not weaknesses. We do not have to be made of steel or become a robot to be “successful”. When we start owning our vulnerability, our life can open up in ways we never imagined. It breaks down all sorts of barriers! 

But vulnerability doesn’t just mean we crying all the time. It means that we are bringing our most authentic self to the forefront. True vulnerability makes room for our humanness. When we are vulnerable, we give ourselves space to process difficult emotions and states of mind. We learn how to work with ourselves instead of against ourselves.  

As Caroline talks about in her book and on her podcast, when we are anxious, instead of running away from those feelings, which can often make the anxiety worse, we should embrace them and ask ourselves things like: 

• What are these feelings trying to tell me?
• What should I be aware of?
• What is going on in my life?
• What may support me better in this moment?

We need to see our anxiety as a signal or messenger, not a life sentence.  

During this process, kindness is key. Self-compassion is an incredible tool when it comes to managing anxiety. Instead of stressing ourselves out more by feeling angry or guilty that we feel a certain way, being kind to ourselves helps regulate the stress response! 

And part of self-compassion means not discounting how we feel or why. Minor traumas that may seem ordinary can accumulate and impact our mental health, especially when we are young, so don’t just think that they can be ignored or suppressed or are “too silly”.  

For more on living with anxiety, listen to my podcast with Caroline (episode #303) and check out her website, podcast and books. If you enjoy listening to my podcast, please consider leaving a 5-star review and subscribing. And keep sharing episodes with friends and family and on social media. (Don’t forget to tag me so I can see your posts!). 

To learn more about how to manage your mental health and help others, join me at our 7th Annual Mental Health Solutions Retreat, December 2-4, 2021! The core focus of this conference is to give you simple, practical, applicable, scalable, and scientific solutions to help you take back control of your mental health, help others, and make impactful changes in your community. You will also learn how to manage the day-to-day stressors of life as well as those acute stressors that blindside us. Our goal is to address your most pressing mental health concerns, help you find answers, and equip you with the knowledge and resources you need to make the change from a life of barely surviving to one where you are thriving. Register today at drleafconference.com and save $50!  

This podcast is sponsored by: 

Bitty Baby by American Girl. So much of what we learn as a child has the ability to impact the way we treat ourselves and how we treat others, which is why it’s so important to provide your little ones with toys that foster those nurturing traits of love, kindness, and care. This is why I love Bitty Baby, which is one of the best ways for moms to introduce their little ones to the world of American Girl. It provides young children with a fun way to learn by enacting moments of nurture with a baby doll with perfect huggability and attention to detail. These dolls—and lessons—are designed to last! My listeners can get an exclusive, one-time offer of 15% off your order of Bitty Baby products with promo code DRLEAF at americangirl.com. Exclusions include 18” dolls, Courtney Arcade, and Bitty Baby Furniture. See americangirl.com/bbpodcast for details.

Grammarly. I love using Grammarly premium to double check my all my work, from the social media posts I put out every day to research papers and book chapters I have strict deadlines for. It works on everything from Instagram to Google docs to Microsoft word, and can be used in so many ways, from just checking vocabulary to making sure that nothing is plagiarized! Grammarly has saved the day multiple times and given me the peace of mind and peace of time to practice some real mental self-care! It helps me get my message across quickly, without repeated or unnecessary words, and helps makes sure all my goals are achieved as I go through my day. Get 20% off Grammarly Premium by signing up at Grammarly.com/DRLEAF. 

LMNT, my favorite electrolyte drink mixes! Not only are they delicious (I love their new watermelon salt flavor!) and easy to travel with, but they are filled with everything you need and nothing you don’t. All of their products contain a science-backed electrolyte ratio—1000 mg sodium, 200mg potassium, and 60 mg magnesium—and are completely “junk-free”: no coloring, no artificial ingredients, no sugar, no gluten and no fillers. For a limited time, you can claim a free LMNT Sample Pack—you only have to cover the cost of shipping (which is just $5 for US customers)! Each sample pack includes 7 packets of LMNT (1 of every flavor), and the offer is limited to one time per customer. For more information and to claim your free offer visit: http://drinklmnt.com/Leaf.

NED. Like many people these days, I have been struggling with uncertainty: what does the future hold? What will tomorrow look like? Where will I be a year from now? What will the world look like? All these anxieties have made everyday activities like sleeping a challenge, which is why I have started using CBD to help support my mental health and brain detoxing. I have found that CBD is a great to help with sleep and reduce pain, anxiety and inflammation. NED produces some of the highest quality CBD available in the world, using Full Spectrum Hemp Oil products extracted from organically grown hemp plants, which are all sourced from an independent farmer named Jonathan in Paonia, CO. All the products that Ned offers are science-backed, nature-based solutions that provide an alternative to prescription and over-the-counter drugs. If you want to check out Ned and try their Full Spectrum Hemp Oil or Sleep Blend for yourself, we have a special offer for the Cleaning Up The Mental Mess audience. Go to www.helloned.com/DRLEAF or enter DRLEAF at checkout for 15% off your first one-time order or 20% off your first subscription order. 

Podcast Highlights 

2:47, 17:20 Caroline’s own experiences with anxiety 

4:50 Anxiety is a normal part of life

6:40, 31:20 What it means to be vulnerable & authentic 

13:40 Why we shouldn’t just try to get rid of or cure our anxiety  

16:00 Resisting feelings of anxiety can make anxiety worse 

16:50, 35:00 The power of kindness & self-compassion 

21:00 Childhood trauma & anxiety  

25:50 Why we need to change the anxiety narrative  

26:20 Why it is okay to have a breakdown!  

32:00 The power of owning our anxiety  

42:30 Why we need to talk about anxiety more 

44:32 Anxiety is a signal & messenger, not a disease  

51:00 Why we need to understand, not suppress, our anxiety  

This podcast and blog is for educational purposes only and is not intended as medical advice. We always encourage each person to make the decision that seems best for their situation with the guidance of a medical professional.  

Switch On Your Brain LLC. is providing this podcast as a public service. Reference to any specific viewpoint or entity does not constitute an endorsement or recommendation by our organization. The views expressed by guests are their own and their appearance on the program does not imply an endorsement of them or any entity they represent. If you have any questions about this disclaimer, please contact info@drleaf.com.